DiaryofSelf Marries in 2020

T – 2 Months Post? Maybe? I Don’t Know Anymore

I am honestly unsure if the wedding will still happen on time. My state is about to go into a stay-at-home order and my venue is closed until further notice. Franklin is trying to stay hopeful, but he’s being stupid. I lost hope. Optimism is stupid at this time (actually, optimism is stupid in general). It is very likely now that our wedding won’t happen. It would make no sense to postpone due to the significance of why our date was chosen. We will just do a courthouse wedding if we can’t have our original date. I know I will go into a serious depression.

I’m going to have Franklin talk to vendors about the possibility of canceling the wedding. We have our invitations and the business who printed the invitations will help us include an insert about the possibility about it not happening, but we’re just going to send the insert that will say (paraphrased) “There is a possibility of our wedding not happening. If you have not booked your flights yet, don’t. Thank you for your understanding.”

This is not an official “The wedding is off. No more DiaryOfSelf’s wedding planning posts” blog post yet. That will come later. Now I’ll have to figure out what to post on here because I have once again lost the original aim of this blog and this turned into a wedding planning blog.

So many people have been telling me for months to call off my wedding because one of my friends in grad school has feelings for me. Guess they’re getting their wish, but not due to my friend from school.

DiaryofSelf Marries in 2020

Coronavirus May Ruin My Wedding

I’m not being dramatic. My wedding may not happen because of Coronavirus. I’m seriously panicking right now.

  • We went from groups of no more than 250 people to 50 people, and now 10-20 people
    • My current guest invite count is over 200 people
  • Piggybacking on the above point, the rule of no groups of more than 50 people is supposed to last 8 weeks
    • This will cut us close to the wedding
  • There are closures and restrictions on business hours
    • I’ve been constantly checking emails to see if my wedding venue is closing
    • I’m supposed to meet my officiant at Panera Bread in April (it’s his preferred meeting place). Can’t sit in at restaurants until who knows when
  • Courthouses are closed for 2 to 3 weeks
    • Can’t get the marriage license yet
  • Franklin may get activated by the national guard for who knows how long
    • Franklin feels like he might be gone for months which will interfere for the wedding

Franklin and I may have to do an emergency courthouse wedding just in case things don’t get better by June. As soon as the courthouse opens up again, we’re getting our marriage license. After that, we’ll figure out whether to get married in the courthouse and wait.

Note: This will be the last blog post that mentions Coronavirus. My therapist has suggested that I limit my exposure to media that mentions the Coronavirus due to my generalized anxiety. Since my readers may also be experiencing anxiety, I will refrain from future Coronavirus blog posts. Please talk to a mental health professional to learn or review coping skills during this time.

By the way, should I continue the T – (number) months posts? We’d still have a ceremony and reception regardless of whether or not we go to the courthouse. We’re also hoping to not postpone just in case my vendors are unavailable on a new date.

DiaryofSelf Marries in 2020

T – 3 Months: Mom’s Other Lucky Number

Holy crap! We’re already 3 months away! I don’t feel like I have everything together! Give me more time before I get married! So what have I done since the four-month mark?

  • Went to a consultation for alterations
  • Picked up my custom-made jewelry
  • Groomsmen and my dad have been measured for their tuxes
  • Got the invitations designed
  • Ordered some things needed for the wedding reception (cake stand, cake topper, etc.)
  • Mom ordered her and grandmother’s gowns online because they can’t find stuff in their sizes that don’t show a massive amount of cleavage

This is what needs to be done between now and the 2-month mark

  • First fitting!
  • Time to send out invitations!
  • Bridesmaids need to pick up their dresses and make alterations appointments
  • Schedule the details meeting at the venue
  • Schedule an appointment to meet with the officiant
  • Hope that Franklin’s family won’t be afraid to fly here

I probably forgot some things, but with school closing due to CoVid-19 and other things being affected by CoVid-19, I’ve been trying to prepare for classes going online after next week as well as other projects for school.

DiaryofSelf Marries in 2020

T – 4 Months: Four Seasons

Hey everyone! We’re starting to get down to the wire here. Since the last time I talked to you at the 5-month mark, this is what has been done!

  • Had my makeup trial and put down the deposit
  • Franklin picked up his resized ring
  • Finalized the style of the tuxes
  • Best man got measured for his tux
  • Got my tiara to wear for the wedding!

This is what needs to be done between now and the 3-month mark:

  • Figure out with my hairstylist which hairstyle I can realistically do
    • I found some pictures online to share
  • Have my dress alterations consultation
  • Mom and grandmother need to find dresses
  • Groomsmen need to get measured
  • Get my custom-made jewelry

And this needs to be done by the end of March

  • Figure out what to put in the wedding registries
  • Maybe figure out where to go for our honeymoon
  • Get Franklin measured for his Class A uniform
  • Think of songs for the important parts of the reception (wedding party‚Äôs reception entrance, first dance, mother-son dance, father-daughter dance, and tosses)
    • I have some songs thought out, but not all of them
  • Get invitations designed and (maybe) sent out
DiaryofSelf Marries in 2020

T – 5 Months: Take 5 (Not the candy bar!)

Hello everyone, and welcome to 2020! You know what that means? It means I get married this year! After the past 2 months being a whirlwind of wedding hell due to my cousin’s incarceration and hunt for another groomsman, things are steadily back on track! So since the 6-month mark, I have done this!

  • We found another groomsman and updated my Meet the Cast blog!
  • Sent out the in-state save the dates!
  • Franklin picked up my wedding band
  • Franklin’s ring has been sent off to be resized
    • Franklin will be wearing his late father’s ring as his wedding band
  • Scheduled a makeup trial
  • Turned in the contract and down payment for the cake

This is what needs to get done between now and 4 months:

  • Have my makeup trial
  • Turn in the contract and down payment for makeup
  • Pick up Franklin’s resized wedding band
  • Finalize the tuxedo design
    • We are waiting for these two vests to arrive through Jim’s Formalwear so we can decide which gold vest to choose
  • Figure out a hairstyle
    • I cut my hair into a pixie cut on March 17, 2017. I have been growing my hair out for the wedding and need to work with my hairstylist too see if I can do a chignon or a bun in the back of my head

And this is what needs to get done by the end of March:

  • Get the groomsmen and best man measured for their tuxes
  • Have my dress alterations consultation and maybe a fitting after the first alterations are made
  • Get Franklin measured for his Class A uniform
  • Think of songs for the important parts of the reception (wedding party’s reception entrance, first dance, mother-son dance, father-daughter dance, and tosses)
    • I have some songs thought out, but not all of them
  • Encourage my mom and grandmother to start looking for dresses to wear for the wedding
  • Get invitations designed and (maybe) sent out
DiaryofSelf Marries in 2020

T – 6 Months: Insert Expletive Here

Oh shoot! We’re down to 6 months until I’m married! Where did the time go? I started the countdown at 18 months, then another at 15 months, and each month starting from one year away. Now we’re at the point where we could pick up our marriage license if we want to do it this early! In the state I live in, you must get married within 6 months of getting your marriage license. So what got done between now and a month ago?

  • Sent out most of the save the dates
  • My matron of honor picked out her dress
  • The third bridesmaid got measured for her dress
  • The matron of honor and two bridesmaids paid for their dress
  • Scheduled a cake tasting
  • Figured out where to do tuxes
  • Found out I need to find a new groomsman (story of that here)
  • Got some more vases
    • Thanks to online shopping taking over the retail industry, AC Moore is closing down so I had to get as many vases as I could. Congratulations, Amazon shopper. You’re killing brick and mortar. I HATE HATE HATE online retails.

This is what needs to be done between now and the 5-month mark:

  • Get the last groomsman
  • Pick out what the tuxes will look like
  • Get the groomsmen measured
  • Finally book a makeup artist
    • Hope it’s not too late to find one
  • Send out save the dates to the people who live in-state
  • Do the cake tasting
  • Figure out what to put in the wedding registry
    • Franklin is supposed to be closing on the house around the end of the month, so now we can have a list of things to put in the house
DiaryofSelf Marries in 2020

Wedding Planning Update: Changes to Things

Hey everyone, I didn’t want to post this, but there have been some changes that will seriously affect things in my wedding.

First of all, my Meet the Wedding Party blog post is wrong now. I need to replace a groomsman now. One groomsman is in jail for violating probation and just got sentenced to a year in jail and he may get out in 6-7 months if he’s on good behavior. Either way, he will not be out in time for the wedding. Once I find a replacement, I will make the change in the blog post.

Also, we may decide to elope, but still have the ceremony and reception on the originally planned day. I feel like so many things aren’t going MY way and if I can’t have the wedding I want, then no one will. What is pushing me over the edge is that I wanted my girls to all have the same shoes, but everyone is now wearing different shoes. The only reason why a girl would be allowed to wear different shoes is if they have medical issues where wearing heels is not an option. However, people are just being picky. You only have to wear the shoes for a few hours. Get over yourselves. If I had to be forced into makeup, you can wear open-toed shoes.

I’m just seriously done with everything. Once Franklin closes in on the house, we’re probably going to the courthouse.